Spiritual Parenting

On the morning of June 3 I will be teaching three seminars for young parents. The theme is "Spiritual Parenting". I am looking forward to this so much, and feel in my heart it will be one of the most important things I have done or will do in my ministry at The Mission.

There is a spiritual crisis among young people today, and the children in Christian homes are far from immune. Statistics tell us that large numbers of young people who have grown up in Christian homes and attended solid Bible believing churches all their lives are putting faith on the shelf and abandoning what we have known as a Christian lifestyle. Some of these are turning from God altogether. The stats confirm this but we don't really need them. We see it all around us

Far greater minds than mine are striving to understand the causes and the solutions for this serious problem. It's evident that neither the causes nor the solutions are straightforward, so in my seminars I will not in any way be pretending to have all the answers. What I can offer are principles, which I believe if diligently applied in Christian homes can have a significant bearing on how children deal with matters of faith and Christian living as they get older. Doing the right things in our homes does not offer any guarantees, but it does improve our chances of seeing our children grow up to love God and live lives that are pleasing to Him.

I intend to share with young parents lessons I've learned from things I did right as a parent, and maybe more importantly things I didn't do right. I will also be drawing on the writing and research of some really excellent Christian leaders and Christian parents who have authored books on the subject.

One of the reasons I am passionate about this is that when I look back on my own family and my years of parenting young children, there are some important things I didn't get right. Don't get me wrong. Both my wife and I were committed to Jesus and we had a pretty solid Christian family. We didn't succumb to many of the pitfalls that entrap or destroy families. We had a strong commitment to serving God and participating in church, and that was our practice as a family. Still, there were some rather critical things I missed.  So among all the things we'll share in these seminars are some important recommendations I wish someone had made to my wife and I while we still had time to get it right.

For example, one of the things I hope to get across loud and clear to Christian parents is this. The spiritual development of your children is YOUR responsibility. You can't delegate or deputize anyone to take it on for you. That includes the great church you attend or the wonderful children's workers in that church. Whenever possible your home must be the primary place of ministry to your children.  While the church can and should play a supportive role, it can never take the place of quality ministry that takes place in the family. 

As young children neither my wife nor I grew up in Christian homes. Christianity was not modeled for us as children and we did not have the opportunity to experience what a truly healthy Christian home could look like. We wanted that for our children and we tried. But without any guidance or instruction, most of our trying meant making sure our kids were regularly in church and Sunday School and mid week programs where the children's ministry experts would teach them all they needed to know. It was a mistake we made in ignorance and with good intentions, yet I feel without excuse when I see other parents with similar backgrounds to ours who seemed to instinctively understand what we did not.

However, the point is not to beat ourselves up. The point is that large numbers of Christian parents, even many who were raised in solid Christian homes, are right now making similar mistakes. They have failed to understand or accept that they have a God given responsibility to teach their children (both by word and example) to love God and serve Him with all their hearts. For many, even the commitment to make sure the kids are in church regularly has been eroded by other influences and other priorities. I desperately want to warn these parents of the dangers before it's too late!

This is a very challenging time for families. Children are growing up in a world where the pressures pulling them away from God are intense. It has never been more important for Christian parents to teach and support and prepare their children for life in an ungodly world. It is not possible to insulate our kids from the world they live in, but it is essential that we prepare them so they can survive and thrive in spite of being immersed in a world designed to destroy their faith. God's word makes it clear that grace is the only real answer ("I have overcome the world"), but it also clearly tells parents that we have a responsibility in partnership with the work of God.

Though I have taught these seminars before I am seeking God for the right words and presentation for THIS group of parents. I would truly appreciate your prayers in that regard. Please pray not just for me, but for the parents God wants to be part of this time of learning and challenge. I am certain that some of those God wants to be there are already feeling the pressures of other things they need or want to do that day. 

In my heart I feel few things could be more important than the principles we will be discussing on that Saturday morning, so my prayer is that parents will resolve to make this their priority for that day. For the sake of their families and their precious children.